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What do emotions have to do with healing?
By Paula Muran
  Emotions are the root cause of almost every injury & illness. Anger, fear, unworthiness & other emotions get “stuffed” into the body. Over time these limiting emotions weaken the physical body creating stiffness, aches, pain & general discomfort,
which eventually can cause more serious conditions like tumors & cancer.
In the
allopathic & Western medicine world, we've lost touch with the basic concept of true healing. We substitute a band-aid
for a cure & wonder why we don’t feel better. People get ill for many reasons. Each diseased state is telling us
that we're ignoring some part of our self & change is necessary. While many factors contribute to healing & it happens
on many levels, all require attention throughout the entire healing practice. Ignoring the mental, emotional or spiritual bodies will not provide adequate & long-term good health.
Emotions are the foundation on which we build our life. They inspire us & they
limit us. Joy, bliss & happiness along with anger, fear, confusion & unworthiness make us a whole person. Anger is often the impetus of motivation to accomplish goals while fear has the exact opposite effect; i.e., head colds are a direct result of emotional confusion. A toxic liver can cause anger. Confusion on the other hand, causes us to become ungrounded & thoughts to loop & we become scattered. Fear can literally cripple us while playing havoc with relationships, careers, success & finances. These limiting emotions cause us to stay stuck in a false perception about the self. Happiness & joy are contagious
& elevate everything we do. But why is it that we experience joy less often, while fear, anger, confusion & unworthiness dominate?
Emotions
& beliefs also shroud our true divine Self. As we explore spirituality, it's necessary to also acknowledge & eventually
release (let go of) the attachments we place on fear, denial & disbelief. This action takes courage & trust as we examine the inner workings of the self.
As our world transitions, there's a real & urgent need to change. External circumstances perpetuate
the already abundant level of fear around us. Anger, confusion & mistrust all contribute to a society that's overwhelmed. It’s time for change!
How to identify limiting emotions:
The easiest
way to change is to look at friends & family members & their behavior patterns. Notice all the things you like about
them & all the things you don’t like, especially the things that really make you crazy. As you look deeply into
them, you're gazing into a reflection of your own self. What you see in another that upsets or angers you is a part of yourself that hasn't yet been healed & loved. Begin by criticizing your dearest friends & then turn
all that criticism around to yourself. This exercise gives you an opportunity to look deeply at your own limiting emotional
issues. Allow others to reflect back your brilliance or limitations. Once you've discovered your personal limitations, it’s
time for change.
Patterns are created when we place judgments upon them. It's important
to experience (feel) the energy of anger but not to judge it - just experience it. Allow anger to run all the way down to your toes. Imagine you're sitting in a pond of murky water & enjoy it. Love the feeling that
anger produces. Most importantly, feel the energy of anger. Allow it to flow thru your body. Next, begin to dialogue with anger. This helps to locate the core issue underneath the anger. Strike up a conversation with anger. Ask it questions like, “What are you teaching me?” or “Why am I so angry all the time?” With these answers, you're able to make permanent changes & move from emotional & physical constrictions
to a nice even flow in your life.
The emotional body is the gateway to the Spiritual
Self. If we find it difficult to acknowledge our fears & feel them, it'll be difficult to connect deeply to our Divine Self.
I Can Read Your Emotions Just Like a Book
By Farouk Radwan
I can read your emotions,
just like a book
Strange title right?
Well it's not
a title; it’s what you'd proudly say after learning how to read body language. Do you know that each emotional state
that we experience has an associated gesture that accompanies it?
Whether this state was confidence, anxiety, fear, boredom, interest or even lying, it'll be reflected into your body language & then read by anyone who understands body
language in depth.
Body language isn't just eye contact & posture as many people
claim. Actually, body language involves any gesture that you make. This gesture could be anything from moving your hand or
leg, to touching your nose or face. All the gestures that you make have a meaning in body language & scientists have already
identified a large number of emotions that can be detected just by watching a person’s
body language.
“But why learn body language?” You may ask.
- Body language can improve your relationships because it'll
take your communication skills to a new level.
- You'll be able to tell whether someone really likes you or
just pretends to.
- You'll leave a positive impression in meetings & job interviews.
You'll be able to show the
emotional state that you want; i.e., you may be terrified while doing a presentation, but still give the impression that you're
confident by adjusting your body language.
Contrary to common belief, body language
is 100% accurate - given that you understand its common pitfalls. Body language is approved world wide & is practiced
by politicians, sales people, secret agents & even presidents.
Feeling uncomfortable
Have you ever looked carefully
at someone standing alone in the street? Did you notice his posture?
Most probably
they'll be crossing his arms & his legs, which is called “the defensive position” in body language.
The person usually takes this position in any of the following cases:
- He's feeling uncomfortable due to being present between lots
of strangers.
- He's shy by nature; in that case this will be his favourite
posture.
- When he is offended (something
happens that he doesn't approve).
The defensive position can
make you fail in a job interview before you even start talking! This may happen due to the awful impression that's left to
the interviewer when he notices the defensive position.
Try to avoid taking this position as much as you can. After all,
even if you feel shy or uncomfortable, your emotions are private & no one should be
allowed to know them without your consent.
Life Changing Tips For Boomers: Rewire Your Brain To Control Your Emotions & Make Positive Life Choices
By Karen Sherman
Do You Seem to Get Caught Up in the Same Old Reactions?
Have you ever
blown up at your spouse only to realize - after the smoke cleared - that you might have over-reacted just a tad? Maybe you
learn that you haven’t been invited to your uncle’s friend’s sister’s birthday party & you behave
as if it’s the slight of the century.
Sometimes even the most minor snafu
can send us storming out of the room, slamming down a phone, or just shutting down entirely. It’s like we just can’t
help it - the reaction is as automatic as a mallet to the knee.
Science Reveals It May Not
Be Your Fault
New research indicates that these habitual, knee-jerk responses
go way back to our childhood. As youngsters, we learned to adapt to our families’ idiosyncrasies as a way of survival.
Psychologists used to refer to these coping mechanisms as our baggage - but what science has now shown us is that these responses
are actually hard-wired into our brains. And because our responses are so ingrained, they've become our filtering system for
future incidents. In other words, if something happens today that the brain reads as being similar to something that happened
in the past, it'll respond as if it were the first time, even though you may be in your 30’s, 40’s, 50’s,
60’s & beyond.
Bringing This to Life
i.e.,
let’s say a child comes from a home where the parents fight frequently. That child is going to associate yelling with
bad feelings. In later years, if his spouse raises her voice, he’s likely to shut down like when he was a kid - metaphorically
running to his room, closing the door & essentially blocking out the noise.
Does
this mean if you come from a family of yellers you’re doomed to hide under your bed every time someone raises a voice?
Luckily, recent research indicates that the brain continues to grow throughout our lives - & old patterns can be released
as new ones are formed in your boomer years..
Help Is On the Way
The way to managing your anger & knee jerk reactions is to establish new connections by refocusing your attention to a different outcome or possibility.
But, before you can foster these new connections in your brain, you have to be aware of the old brain triggers.
When I try & distinguish whether someone’s reaction is a past association, I look to
see if their reaction to the situation is automatic & intense. Additionally, when I try & offer an alternative to
why they’re behaving that way, the person is resistant & reluctant to consider any other view or interpretation of the situation - other than their own.
In my practice, I work extensively
with clients to help them rewire & rewrite their lives. Here's an easy exercise to get you started on rewiring your brain
to control your anger & over-reactions that'll bring about positive changes in your life-today!
1.
Thinking of Alternatives
a. When you’re
projecting your past experience onto a present one, try & imagine alternative ways to handle the situation; i.e., let’s
say you have lunch plans with a friend - who cancels at the last minute. Immediately, you feel an overwhelming sense of hurt
& rejection. Which is how you always feel in similar situations - indicating - voila - a past pattern! Be conscious of
this & take a step back to recognize it.
b. Then, approach the situation from
an entirely different perspective. Maybe you use humor to deflect the bad feelings, thinking to yourself, “Gee, I guess
it’s my deodorant.” Or, you choose the direct approach & ask your friend if you’ve done something to
upset her. Or, you take the practical route & figure your friend just overbooked, overextended, or over-promised - &
give her a get-out-of-jail-free card. (Hint: If you have difficulty coming up with alternative
ways to handle the situation, think about how someone else - your mother, a childhood friend, an admired acquaintance - might
handle the same situation.)
2. Plugging
in New Choices:
a. Now, replay the actual situation as vividly as possible
- the phone ringing, the sound of your friend’s voice, the awkward goodbyes - & imagine yourself carrying out one
of your new solutions. Maybe you decide that being understanding of your friend’s busy schedule is the best choice.
b. Replay the phone call & plug in your new behavior, the understanding you, rather than playing
out your old behavior of feeling rejected & hurt.
Making it Last
Before long, you'll begin to see a slight shift in how you feel. By doing this exercise again
& again, you'll refocus your attention on a new outcome. This will rewire your brain & make a new neural connection
- a connection to positive change!
The Phases Of Manifestation Part 2. Thought & Emotion
By Dwayne Gilbert
The 3 secrets of manifestation into the world around us are thought, word & deed. It's very important to
learn to align these 3 areas if you're to realize the life of your dreams. The ability to make these 3 areas move you in the
direction you want to go in order for you to be able to live the life of your dreams is essential. If any one of these 3 areas
is out of sync with the other 2, you'll have difficulty in realizing the manifestation of your dreams into the world around
you. The first of these 3 secrets is the secret of thoughts & emotions.
Our thoughts & emotions go hand in hand. Deep rooted beliefs
& thoughts about things create an emotional response to situations & experiences that we find ourselves in on a daily
basis. This emotional reaction causes us to think certain thoughts based upon prior programming from other situations &
similar experiences. It can be a very vicious cycle; i.e., let's say that when we were 4 years old, we were attacked by our
grandmother's cat. Our grandmother's cat would hide behind doorways & wait for us to walk by just so it could ambush us.
This caused us to fear cats in general. Now, as adults, no matter how friendly a cat is, we have a negative emotional response to it based upon
that emotion of fear we learned when we were 4 years old & attacked by our grandmother's cat. Because of that fear, we created the
perception that all cats are bad & just waiting to attack us. Is this actually the case? Are all cats vicious & nasty
& just wanting to harm us? Of course not, however, our emotional response has created all kinds of negative emotions toward cats & thoughts about what cats are.
So
what does all of this have to do with thoughts & emotions & getting what you want?
Everything.
Growing up we had certain beliefs, ideas & concepts instilled in us about things by our friends, family
& loved ones. Let's use money i.e. Many people who don't have money grew up in a family who didn't have money.
Often times, they were taught that people who do have money usually walked all over people to get there. They
lied, cheated & stole when they could to get to where they are. Surely there are some who did, but does that mean everyone
who became financially wealthy did that? No, of course not! Just like every cat isn't a horrible monster out to get us. But
those beliefs & ideas created a certain emotional response & trigger to people who have money. Often times a very
negative one. So what did that do to us? It created the thought, because of the fact that we feel negative feelings toward
people with money, that if we have money we too would be a bad person. Of course no one wants to be a bad person, so without
even knowing it, we relate the fact that we want money to being a bad person & logically create reasons why we shouldn't
be wealthy financially.
So the first step in the creation process is to begin to
realize what our current beliefs & thoughts & emotions toward things are. If you
want to create wealth in realtionships, you must evaluate what your concept of a relationship is. Some people have very healthy
marriages by being open sexually & allowing one another to sleep with other people.
Other people have very healthy
marriages being completely committed to one another & never sleeping with anyone else. One or the other isn't right or
wrong unless you believe it to be so, but you must decide what you believe a relationship to be about & what creates a
healthy relationship. You must also decide what you believe is a good partner & what traits a good partner should have.
You must also take note of how you feel about certain traits in a relationship or marriage & in a significant other. These
emotions & thoughts create your perception of what a relationship is & what kind
of a relationship you'll attract to you.
Take the time to truly look at your thoughts
about certain things & be honest with yourself. There's no right or wrong answer but the one you choose to be correct
for you. Here's an example. Is killing right or wrong? 99% of the population will say that killing is absolutely wrong. Here's
the devil's advocate. What if someone were trying to kill you or your child or a loved one & the only way to stop them
was to kill that person? Is killing right or wrong then. Well, we can split hairs over this but it comes down to this. Nothing
is ever right or wrong except in a specific context. You must decide what your context for things is & then create your
life based upon that. So often so many people create their perception of the world based on others ideas & concepts. I
know many people who will not do what they truly love simply because others think it would be a foolish idea. A friend of
mine was a doctor at one point in his life. His true passion was to move to the mid-west & take people on white water
rapid tours. So many people around him said he'd be foolish for giving up his great paying job as a doctor, which cost him
a good 80 hours a week of his life by the way & go take people on white water rapid tours. Eventually he did make the
move & is much happier than ever before, even with less money. So take the time to evaluate you & what your ideas
are & what ideas would better serve you.
Overcoming Negative Emotions
Kim Eickhoff
One of the many lessons I've
learned in my life & continue to learn, is that my thoughts create my emotions &
my emotions create my behaviors & then it circles back around.
Once this cycle begins it
seems almost impossible to stop. If my thoughts are positive in nature, the results can help me live my best life. However,
if they're negative thoughts, what follows are negative feelings, followed by negative behaviors. Thru this pattern I've come
to realize that I must look at my negativity as an opportunity to grow & develope. I've developed a series of steps that
help me acknowledge when this pattern of negativity is beginning, as well as how to disrupt the pattern & ultimately stop
it from continuing any further.
The first step is to create more awareness as to
what thoughts I'm actually thinking when I'm thinking them. I use a technique called quieting the mind. To quiet the mind
I meditate in order to cultivate mindfulness. Mindfulness basically means awareness & I've found that the more I practice
meditation, the more mindful or aware I become of the constant barrage of negative thoughts that flow thru my mind. This awareness
has allowed me to realize that not all of my thoughts are rational, or are they necessarily based in reality. Therefore, because
of my awareness, a red flag appears each time I think something negative about myself, my situation, or even an idea that
I might have. When this flag goes up I'm instantly able to reassess the thought & see where it might have originated &
if it still holds any truth for me. Many times the thought is something I learned as a child, or was told as a child by significant
others in my life, but it isn't what I believe as an adult. Then with this knowledge I'm able to challenge it & eventually
erase it.
The 2nd technique is called
listening to the heart. Listening to the heart involves paying attention to the actual feelings I'm feeling in any given situation.
I've learned that my feelings provide very valuable information as to what my values are, what my true beliefs are, what situations
or people drain my energy & what boundaries I need to create & enforce in order to protect myself.
Many times my negative thoughts
instantly create a negative feeling of being frustrated, irritated, angry, jealous & afraid. Since these thoughts & feelings happen almost simultaneously, I've learned that not only do I
need to pay more attention to the actual thought that triggers the negative emotions, I
also need to pay more attention to the emotion itself. The first thing I do is identify
what feeling I'm experiencing. I then allow myself the room to experience that feeling, which provides me with the opportunity
to work thru the feeling & get past it. Thru this process I'm also able to connect the feeling to a deeper meaning for
me, realizing that whatever I'm angry or frustrated about in that moment, isn't the real issue. The real issue is much deeper. This provides a much broader perspective
from which to view my feelings, which makes them less overwhelming.
The bottom line is that the more awareness I create
around what actually fuels my emotions & ultimately my behaviors, the more control I
have over how I respond to various situations & stressors. Learning that the more conscious I am, the better decisions
& choices I'll make, which will lead to a happier, more balanced & more meaningful life. Making these connections
is imperative in disrupting & stopping the negative patterns of thoughts, feelings & behaviors.
It might be useful for you in your own life to look at some your behaviors that you might view as negative.
They can be behaviors of trying to control or manipulate those around you, or over eating, over spending, working too much,
drinking too much, being judgmental towards others, or a combination of some or all of these. We all have behaviors that we
engage in that don't lift us up to be our best selves.
If we learn to analyze what feelings might be driving
those behaviors & then what thoughts are driving those feelings, it becomes possible to stop & interrupt this pattern.
We can then choose new patterns that are more positive & that'll help us create our best life from the inside out.
Get Those Emotions in Motion
Release
Your Repressed Emotions
You can’t see them! You can’t touch them! But you sure can feel them! Unless
of course you have them buried under layers and layers of “protection” -- whether those layers are physical as
in layers of extra flesh, or emotional as in standoffish walls that proclaim to the people around you, "don't get too close".
Many
of us have been holding back and storing unfelt emotions. What’s the purpose? Unfortunately, the reason behind suppressed
emotions is self-defeating. Holding back from “feeling your feelings” is usually how we try to protect ourselves
from being hurt. However, the resistance to feeling your emotions when they arise is what really causes pain.
Unfelt
and unexpressed emotions manifest in many ways. They may be felt only on a “discomfort level”, as if something
is wrong and you don’t know what it is. Sometimes it’s even hard to pinpoint what exactly is the cause of your
dis-ease or dis-comfort. Maybe it’s a feeling of dissatisfaction with yourself, with your life, with others around you.
Sometimes it’s a feeling of anger or disappointment that doesn’t seem to have a cause. Yet, if you stop and question
yourself as to the cause of your confusion, the truth will come to the surface. There is always a cause for our feelings --
it's just that many times we have hidden it from ourselves as well as from others.
So the first question is to ask
yourself is “What am I feeling?” The typical repressed answer is “I don’t know”. Just walk past
that hurdle by asking another question: “What feelings am I not expressing?” If that still draws a blank, then
ask yourself “If I knew what I was feeling, what would I say it is?” What is your answer? Ah! ha! Usually that
will bring up some type of response... Is it sadness, anger, fear? What answer do you get to the question? It may be more
than one thing... you may have many layers of levels of feelings associated with your present state of mind or moon.
Once
you have uncovered the emotions that you’ve been keeping in storage or repressing, look at them. You don’t need
to analyze and criticize. Don't judge yourself, blame yourself, or tell yourself that you "shouldn't" feel that way. Only
look at them, and tell them (the feelings) and tell yourself that it is o.k. to feel this way. Then, let yourself feel your
anger, your sadness, your fear. Really feel it! Go ahead and cry, or beat your pillow... whatever you feel to do (just don't
hurt anyone).
The repressed emotions need to come out so they stop poisoning you and your life. An example of how
repressed stuff still affects you: Imagine that you are allergic to something. So you push the "something" under the bed so
you can't see it. Well, will that help any at all? Of course not -- you'll still be allergic, and even if you can't see the
"something", your allergies will still be stimulated. The same goes with repressed emotions. Just because you have stuffed
them "under the bed", doesn't mean they don't affect you. They do, and the solution to your problems can be identified even
though you've hidden or buried or repressed the cause.
The body, especially once you have made the decision to heal
yourself, will always seek to become healthy and whole. When energies are building up inside of you, somewhat like a volcano’s
powerful gases, your body will do everything in its power to get rid of the poison. It is better for you, as well as for the
people around you, when you clear and release your emotions without “dumping” on others. Those old feelings have
nothing to do with people around you anyway. They are your stuff. It is surely better for you to release your pent-up emotions
in this way than picking a scapegoat to bear the brunt of that energy, or repressing the emotions inside and creating physical
problems for yourself.
Tell yourself often that it is o.k. and safe to be a feeling human being. Many times in our
upbringing, we were told not to show our anger, not to show our sadness or fears. So consequently, we “behaved”
and poisoned ourselves by repressing those reactions to our daily life.
Take time to be with yourself, especially when
you feel slightly out of kilter, and talk to yourself (silently is fine). Ask yourself what it is that you’re not expressing,
what you are not feeling... and then go into those feelings. Feel them. Experience them. Feeling them will free you to go
on your way unburdened by the chains of emotion that were binding you to your past.
Don’t be afraid that you
are unlocking the door of the dam and that you will be bowled over with a flood of emotions. It may feel like that at first,
but as the pressure of unexpressed emotions releases, so will the pressure on your self be lessened, and you will feel lighter.
You will not cry forever. The anger will not keep on exploding forever. The pain will not go on forever. Once you release
the pressure, you can fully take off the cover and let it flow out gracefully.
Source: Unknown
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Helping Kids Master Their Emotions
By Robin Schafer
Stress is a word all too familiar to children in schools these days.
Every year, students are required to take standardized tests, which takes so much preparation time, many parents are finding
the need to enroll their children in extra tutorial programs after school just to keep up in the classroom. Add that to massive
amounts of homework combined with too many extracurricular activities & kids are bound to feel the pressure.
This is leading to an increase in problems with anxiety including attention deficit disorder.
There's such a high rate of teen depression that there aren’t enough psychologists to handle the caseloads. Meanwhile,
teachers are finding students are much more fidgety & unable to sit still in class. There isn’t enough exercise
outside the classroom because there’s simply not enough time.
There are 5 techniques
which help reduce anxiety, all of which I’ve seen work firsthand:
- MEDITATION: slowing
down and finding calm & peace for moments at a time makes a big difference.
- DEEP BREATHING:
even if it’s for a short, quick, deep breath, it relaxes the body & mind almost immediately.
-
VISUALIZATION: this is more of a long-term stress reducer. Let’s say your son plays goalie in soccer. This is a tough
position, which can create a lot of anxiety for a kid because if a ball slips by, a child may put the entire outcome of the
game on his shoulders.
But, taking about 5 minutes a day twice a day to just close his eyes
& visualize himself doing well could make all the difference. Over a period of time, not only may he actually do much
better, but he’ll be much less stressed about it when the other team scores.
- WRITING IN A JOURNAL: this helps
because words on the page become a visual reminder of progress.
- EXERCISE: this allows children to work out their
stress & frustration physically.
In the past, people always put so much credence on academic intelligence, when
in fact it’s been proven time & again that emotional intelligence is truly the key to a happier & optimistic
individual. Learning how to handle stress & pressure thru positive outlets at an early age creates fewer problems in college
& fewer cases of teen depression.
With such a strong focus on academics, children are being tested more & at
earlier ages. Such an emphasis has been placed on these tests, in fact, that towns receive funding based on how well their
schools perform. If the schools don’t do well, it’s publicized, it hurts property values & fewer people will
move there. This, in turn, is creating even more pressure on our kids to perform.
As the mother of 3 children between
the ages of 11 & 21, I’ve seen the stress firsthand & I know all about the pressures that come with adolescence.
I wanted youngsters to have a place to turn, so my husband, Randy & I launched a web-based subscription program that teaches
children between the ages of 8-13 strategies for coping with that stress while gaining self-confidence. Masterful Kids is
a secure, members-only website that helps youngsters understand, communicate & control their emotions
with the help of their peers & parents, in a positive manner.
Thru the site, children are offered programs
based on the following:
- Achieving goals
- Being Grateful
- Being Healthy thru Exercise
- Being
Happy
- Being Positive
- Feeling Special
- Handling Difficult People
- Learning from Mistakes
- Stress Management
Techniques
- Understanding Feelings
The programs contain 5 sub-sections
including an introduction, video, daily journal, kids, opinion page, parents’ forum, bibliography section & a blog.
Each culminates with a monthly conclusion where kids can reflect upon their progress.
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High Calorie Emotions
By Sonya Green
Weight Loss & body Image
Permanent Weight loss isn't about Diet. There are many products
& services promising fantastic results. Some are good, most are average, usually they cost more than they're worth &
some are outright dangerous. Losing weight is a simple matter of either decreasing calorie intake or increasing energy output.
Most people combine both to achieve fast results.
Most people have tried this method often enough to know that it works
& I've found that most dieters know more about food than anyone. My main aim is to attack the many causes of weight gain
& focus more on the creation of new habits to bring about permanent weight loss maintenance.
There's no such thing
as a fattening food.
No one food is either fattening or slimming. It’s this simple: Food contains calories &
calories are units of energy. There are no fat calories or thin calories, 2000 cake calories are exactly the same as 2000
celery calories.
Calories are burned by the body to produce energy. Just being alive burns calories. However, the more
active the body the bigger the burn. If you burn the same amount of calories as you eat then your weight will remain the same.
If you eat 3000 calories & burn 2000 then 1000 are stored (as fat).
Overweight people don't necessarily
eat a huge amount of food or a huge amount of “bad food”, they simply consume more calories than they need. The
unused calories are then stored in the body as fat.
If you put too few calories in, the body will take the stored calories
(fat) & use that for energy, thereby, creating weight loss.
One point I do wish to make about food is this: Vitamins,
Minerals, Protein, Carbohydrate, Fat, etc. are vital to maintaining health. Foods heal, build & repair. Foods balance
your metabolism & produce energy & well being. You'll not get fat from eating cakes & drinking soda however, if
you're putting in calories that have little or no nutritional content, you'll become tired, depressed, unmotivated & ultimately
very sick.
Your weight can be about many things or a combination of many things. Overeating may be part of the problem
but what's the cause of overeating? Your reasons may be unique, but many of the common causes are:
Boredom
Depression
Tiredness
Loneliness
Tension.
Many issues are related
to body image, self-esteem & even sexual issues.
Body image often relates to
many weight issues. You may, on a very logical level, desire a thinner body. However, sub consciously you may associate being
normal or comfortable with the shape of your mother, siblings, or friends. If you're a wife or mother yourself, you may subconsciously
feel that your body image, as a wife & mother, conflicts with the body image of a single & available woman. Sometimes
becoming a wife & mother creates conflict with being sexually attractive to other men.
Some
people feel safer or stronger by being bigger & may panic or feel insecure when they've lost weight.
Being overweight can often be used to repress sexuality. Teenage girls often find sexual advances intimidating
& sub-consciously put on weight as a barrier, which continues throughout life.
Binge
eating is usually about punishment. This is very common in high achievers. (Anorexics & Bulimics are often in this category
as well.) Bingeing is about trying to get it perfect & then destroying all effort if there's a slight slip up
Binge eating is also very common with Pre menstrual -syndrome. PMS can cause women to be emotionally
fragile, their thinking can be fuzzy, their body can retain fluid, which means their body feels fatter or bloated, there's
discomfort in the stomach area & sugar cravings are common. If you're serious about long-term weight maintenance, you
must be prepared for this. You must plan alternative actions like being kind to yourself & being more flexible, self loving
& forgiving. Keep a calendar & be prepared before you hit crisis point.
Eating Emotions
Some
people find they that have an emotional attachment to food. If you were rewarded with sweets for good behavior or sent to
your room without dinner for bad behaviour, you may very well be treating food as a reward or a punishment. Your eating habits
may have become confused with approval or disapproval. If your family were poor you may acquaint food with being prosperous
or successful.
For most people the stomach area is the emotional centre of the body. Stress, worry & unhappiness
will create tightness here; often overeating is an automatic response to releasing this tension. Interestingly, some people
find that under stress or in a state of unhappiness, they actually can’t eat at all. Usually overweight people, use
food to release & stretch the area, this is particularly obvious in a binge eating session. Food can nurture & food
can provide comfort. By detached observation you learn a lot about yourself & your food habits. Watch yourself without
judgement for a few weeks & you’ll be amazed at how often you're feeding your emotions.
Food
Eating well means providing your body with the highest nutritional values. If your nutritional
needs aren't met, you'll quickly become tired, unhappy & unwell. The right foods help to rebuild & repair your body,
increase energy, improve immune function, detoxify, build muscle & eliminate waste products. Most importantly the food
you eat can influence how you feel. How you feel influences your behavior. Within just a week or two you may be happier, more
energized, more motivated & slimmer. From this point the food thing becomes easier & easier.
Eat smaller & more often.
Large meals zap your energy. Too much food, particularly high animal fat or too many protein combinations will almost put
you to sleep. Remember that being tired physically or mentally will be the biggest enemy to your success.
P.M.T.
Pre Menstrual Tension. Ah! That time of month.
PMT can create the monster. Some women go thru hell
at this time of month. You must tune in to your body & get to know the signs. A few women have little discomfort for a
day or 2 before a period but for many women PMT can bring about a week or even 2 weeks of emotional chaos.
Fluid retention (bloating)
is very common & extremely frustrating to a diet. This is the time when you feel fat, your thinking is fuzzy, your emotionally
touchy, little annoyances become major frustrations, you face breaks out, your hair is lifeless & your craving sugar,
bread & salt. Headaches & stomach pain is common, Muscles feel achy, feet swell & you feel Tense & stressed
out.
Use this time to do something special or simply pull back & only do the absolute necessities. Pamper your self
a little (or a lot) If you break the diet be kind gentle & forgiving.
Fluids
Fluid
retention isn't caused by drinking too much fluid. Fluid can fluctuate due to hormone levels, too much salt or too little
exercise. Often the body retains fluid in people who habitually don’t drink enough. People often mistake dehydration
for hunger, water helps digestion & elimination. Dehydration can cause headaches, fatigue & constipation. It’s
also great for your skin.
Breathing
Many people use food as a stress
buster. If stress is left unchecked it will build & accumulate. Quite often we don't even realize we're stressed until
it's too late. It’s very difficult to reduce stress when we're stressed. Deep slow breathing must be incorporated into
your weight loss plan. By deep breathing thru out the day you'll be able to diffuse stress & prevent the build up.
Keeping up your oxygen levels further helps by improving digestion & releasing toxins. When
you're stressed your metabolism is impeded, your muscles tighten & you become exhausted.
Breathing
will keep your energy levels up & Improves your sense of well-being. You may already have a habit of stretching your stomach
muscles by eating, why not replace this habit with stretching & releasing the stomach muscles with calorie fee air?
Habit
A habit is a behavior that's repeated to such a degree that the sub conscious mind computes
the entirety of the information & creates an automatic behaviour. Eating habits are usually formed in childhood &
will require conscious awareness, alternative reactions & repetition of new behaviours. Ultimately you'll bring your new
eating habits into an automatic behavior.
The goal is to get to a point where you
don't think about food at all. Food can pick you up when you're feeling tired or out of sorts, Food can calm you down when
stressed or anxious, Food can replace boredom or loneliness. Food is used as a celebration, a reward, a comfort & an expression
of friendship. Food can be an expression of love & friendship. Food can also be a punishment.
Don’t eat your anger. Consider this. Every pound of body fat could well be the weight &shape of last years disappointments!
Creative Visualization
This
is the easiest & most effective way to bring about permanent change. It's an excellent technique for exploring the sub
conscious mind; It’s deeply relaxing as well as energizing. Most importantly it can greatly lock in new habits in the
fastest easiest way possible.
Body Image
Your body is the most valuable asset
you have. It's smarter than any computer, there's no scientist, doctor or chemist able to heal, repair or protect you like
your own body can, it's your home & your vehicle. There's no person & no thing in this entire universe that will serve
or protect you like your own body. Your freedom, happiness, pleasure, vitality & health are all gifts to you from your
body.
The most amazing thing to realize is that most people disrespect & sometimes
even hate their bodies. Many people poison their own bodies; certainly in our culture we have somehow taken on big fat lies
about our bodies. Stop for a moment right now & consider your attitude to your body. Is there a sense of shame? When you
think or speak about your body is there respect & admiration or self-loathing criticism or indifference?
If you apply truth & logic you can only know that your body is the most fascinating intelligent
valuable possession you have.
How much body disrespect has your weight created? Think
about the unloving thoughts & feelings you've directed at your body. Weight is simply too much body fat kept in storage,
its no big deal. Have you ever really stopped to consider the millions of wonderful processes within your body or do you simply
focus on fat & divorce your body from yourself.
In summary I'd like to simplify
the most important aspects of permanent weight loss maintenance.
1. Make your
decisions based on your own truth.
2. Choose food
based on high nutritional content.
3. Breathe deeply
& often.
4. Practise creative
visualization daily
5. Eliminate
or minimize fear stress & worry
6. Replace eating
with the pursuit of other pleasures.
7. Observe your
emotional responses & habits.
Excerpt from www.reinventingmyself.com by Sonya Green
"I had to become aware that there were such things as emotions that lived in my body
and then I had to start learning how to recognize and sort them out. I had to become aware of all the ways that I was
trained to distance myself from my feelings."
Robert Burney
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